There are a few times when moms and their children feel like they belong to different sections of the world. The difference in choices, expectations, and wishes are issues that produce clashes and misunderstanding between them. “Conflict in families, especially between mothers and children, is part of the natural order of things,” says Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW.
Moms will always feel like their children are doing everything wrong and they have to make it right. On the other hand, their children will misunderstand this course of action as being a controlling parent with overboard expectations. It is just one of the examples of misunderstood motherly behaviors which we are going to talk about in this article.
They Set Rules And Standards – This is quite normal in most cases. A mother sets standards for her children to ensure that she can enhance their potentials while she is still young. “A parent’s job is to help her children learn to successful meet all of these needs daily and responsibly,” says Nancy S. Buck, PhD.
The older she gets, the lesser help she can give to her beloved children. The time will come when her children have to leave her care, and she wants to guarantee that they can survive the cruel world out there once they do.
The Spanking And Flying Sandals – It rarely occurs in western countries due to strict laws regarding child cruelty, but it is a common thing in Asian countries. The purpose of this action is not to inflict pain on her children (it honestly doesn’t hurt that much). The act of mothers spanking and hurling their slippers or sandals is to instill respect and discipline, and to help her children distinguish right from wrong. It gives children the idea that any wrongdoing will result in consequences. Children will realize this better once they get older and face the cruel world outside. However, excessively doing it is not advisable due to the mental after effects it can cause.
Treating Her Children Like They Are Still Babies – This is not an issue for children ages seven and below. However, it is quite an embarrassing thing from her children’s perspective once they become teens. An example of this scenario is bringing them lunchboxes out of the blue or telling her teens to come home before dark when they are with friends. Mom is just cherishing the time while she can still take care of her children. She feels that no matter how much they have grown, they will continue to be her babies.
The Hair Cut Issues – This is mind-boggling to most male children. Moms will always remind their boys of their hair getting too long and that they already need a haircut (it sometimes needs to be mom’s choice of style). Teens are mostly annoyed by this issue, and they are sometimes horrified of the funny looking hairstyle results. The funny thing is that mom’s boys will still look very handsome to her no matter the outcome of the haircut.
The behaviors above are just some of our moms’ misunderstood ways of portraying how much we mean to them. It would be too long if we put everything on a list if we try to. However, we as children should cherish all of these times. We do not know how long our moms will be at our side. No matter how imperfect our moms might be, we need to love them as much as they love us.
As a parent, John Duffy, PhD, explains, “I know we will have our difficulties and challenges, but I don’t want to miss a single moment with him… Allow yourself to be available enough to enjoy in, and thrive in, this relationship.”